This week has been full of unpleasant moments (but some very pleasant ones, too) but if I had to pick one unpleasant moment above all others, it would be this one:

So, there I am, lying on a weight bench, 8 reps into my third set of chest presses. I am pushing a 75 pound dumbbell in each hand and at this point, I have pushed them for a total of 35 times. Five more reps and I hit 40, at which point I will stop. Or, and now we get to the unpleasant part, I could just stop at 8 when I feel something in my left shoulder painfully pop in the middle of the rep, causing great pain and resulting in my arm collapsing so I kind of bounce the 75 pound weight off of my chest.

The trainer took me through a series of exercises with both arms afterwards and determined that I did not have any muscle problem or any rotator cuff problem. I am not sure what failed but I know that I am a bit sore, still, and quite hugely pissed off.

Yes, a most unpleasant moment, indeed, when I realized that my arm was going to collapse on me.

I trust, for my friends out there, your day is going better than mine.

Posted by: Random Penseur at 12:46 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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I was idly casting my gaze over today's NY Times restaurant review when a remark in said review kind of jumped off the page and slapped me on the chin. Here's the remark:

[T]hey know that many diners sprinting to the newest hot spot donÂ’t really want to find anything new. They want reassurance that theyÂ’ve mastered whatÂ’s worth knowing.

Half of being cool in New York is making it look like you are in the know. I assume that applies just about everywhere, of course, but the fact is that the pace of change in New York can feel so rapid, with so many people full of tremendous energy packed in like rats on a sinking ship, so many of them feverishly working away at redefining what's cool and what's now and what, by contrast, is so pathetically two weeks ago, that it takes on an extra edge in New York. Or, at least, we'd like to think so. Those of us in the know. You know.

But it does seriously point out one thing: at some point you just get tired of trying to absorb new facts and new information so that it looks like you are in the know. At some point, the brain overloads. That's when pizza comes in. Pizza is your cure for the overworked mind.

Or chocolate. That's good, too.

I seem to have gone way off from where I wanted to go and, now that I am lost in the strange byways of my own mind, cannot figure out how to get back.

Ah, well. Interesting quote, though, right?

Posted by: Random Penseur at 02:35 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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If you visited my site yesterday between, say, 5:00 and 10:00 last night, you would have seen not the lovely banners my friend Margi created for me out of my pictures of Antigua Guatemala, but some odd Islamic midget wrapped in that ever so attractive burka along with a scrawl that I believe represented a form of communication in Arabic. In other words, I was hacked by someone from the Arabic speaking (or at least, typing) world. I was unhappy about it, certainly, although I have no idea what message the writing was intended to convey. Perhaps a simple, "Kilroy was here" kind of thing.

Either way, huge thanks to the Pixy Master himself for restoring peace, order and tranquility to my little home.

And so, ceaselessly beating against the currents, we blog on.

Posted by: Random Penseur at 08:51 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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I had not heard of this thing before, the last lecture. Have you? It is thought provoking and more than a little searing. The idea is that you have one chance to speak, one chance to give your last words, your last thoughts, your last reflections, your final synthesis of your years of concentrated musing, your parting words.

I don't know (and indeed, shy away from thinking about it too deeply) what I would say at my last lecture.

This article from the Wall Street Journal, which I excerpt below, blew me away:

At Carnegie Mellon, however, Dr. Pausch's speech was more than just an academic exercise. The 46-year-old father of three has pancreatic cancer and expects to live for just a few months. His lecture, using images on a giant screen, turned out to be a rollicking and riveting journey through the lessons of his life.

He began by showing his CT scans, revealing 10 tumors on his liver. But after that, he talked about living. If anyone expected him to be morose, he said, "I'm sorry to disappoint you." He then dropped to the floor and did one-handed pushups.

Clicking through photos of himself as a boy, he talked about his childhood dreams: to win giant stuffed animals at carnivals, to walk in zero gravity, to design Disney rides, to write a World Book entry. By adulthood, he had achieved each goal. As proof, he had students carry out all the huge stuffed animals he'd won in his life, which he gave to audience members. After all, he doesn't need them anymore.

He paid tribute to his techie background. "I've experienced a deathbed conversion," he said, smiling. "I just bought a Macintosh." Flashing his rejection letters on the screen, he talked about setbacks in his career, repeating: "Brick walls are there for a reason. They let us prove how badly we want things." He encouraged us to be patient with others. "Wait long enough, and people will surprise and impress you." After showing photos of his childhood bedroom, decorated with mathematical notations he'd drawn on the walls, he said: "If your kids want to paint their bedrooms, as a favor to me, let 'em do it."

While displaying photos of his bosses and students over the years, he said that helping others fulfill their dreams is even more fun than achieving your own. He talked of requiring his students to create videogames without sex and violence. "You'd be surprised how many 19-year-old boys run out of ideas when you take those possibilities away," he said, but they all rose to the challenge.

He also saluted his parents, who let him make his childhood bedroom his domain, even if his wall etchings hurt the home's resale value. He knew his mom was proud of him when he got his Ph.D, he said, despite how she'd introduce him: "This is my son. He's a doctor, but not the kind who helps people."

He then spoke about his legacy. Considered one of the nation's foremost teachers of videogame and virtual-reality technology, he helped develop "Alice," a Carnegie Mellon software project that allows people to easily create 3-D animations. It had one million downloads in the past year, and usage is expected to soar.

"Like Moses, I get to see the Promised Land, but I don't get to step foot in it," Dr. Pausch said. "That's OK. I will live on in Alice."

Many people have given last speeches without realizing it. The day before he was killed, Martin Luther King Jr. spoke prophetically: "Like anybody, I would like to live a long life. Longevity has its place." He talked of how he had seen the Promised Land, even though "I may not get there with you."

Dr. Pausch's lecture, in the same way, became a call to his colleagues and students to go on without him and do great things. But he was also addressing those closer to his heart.

Near the end of his talk, he had a cake brought out for his wife, whose birthday was the day before. As she cried and they embraced on stage, the audience sang "Happy Birthday," many wiping away their own tears.

Dr. Pausch's speech was taped so his children, ages 5, 2 and 1, can watch it when they're older. His last words in his last lecture were simple: "This was for my kids." Then those of us in the audience rose for one last standing ovation.

If you'd like to see the full video report (some 4 minutes), here it is:

Posted by: Random Penseur at 12:53 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Our news outlets have been full of stories lately about unsafe products coming in to the United States. There are unsafe toys and unsafe pet food. There have been unsafe fruits and vegetables contaminated with all kinds of icky things which lead, I gather, to hospital stays and other unhappy experiences. Other times, you hear about and may have even witnessed people choking in restaurants on fish bones or a piece of gristle from a steak. Happens even in the best of dining establishments.

Well, I have a solution to this problem. A solution so obvious I am shocked to be the first one to propose it.

Only eat dessert.

That's right. The people are right who advocate: "Life is short, eat dessert first". There are no food safety issues with dessert. When did you hear last about contaminated chocolate? Never, that's when.

When did you see someone choking on ice cream? Never.

You want to be safe and careful and sane when you eat?

Eat dessert. Leave the meat and vegetables to the dare devils.

Me, I'm advocating a pure risk averse life style here: eat only dessert.

Be safe, people.

Posted by: Random Penseur at 09:17 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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I am sorry about all of the silence over here. Things have been crazy busy at work and with the Jewish holidays coming very early this year, well, I have not had a lot of time to write. So, in case you were interested, that's my excuse and I am sticking to it.

I don't have a whole lot else to say right now, or rather, I have so much to say that my thoughts have crowded each other out in the race to get to the front of the line. So, I will be back when I calm down a titch.

Posted by: Random Penseur at 12:52 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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